Sorry, we've just seen the new AP Poll and we've got to say these three words: "You're joking, right?"

Seriously. Penn State at No. 5 (albeit tied with Ole Miss)?

They've played NOBODY. OK, nor have Texas. Or Florida.

Why isn't USC and Alabama No. 2 and No. 3, after big wins against USC and Virginia Tech. Sure, Florida should still be No. 2—because they've caned both of their opponents and ARE the best team in college football, and Penn State sitting happily at No. 7?

There's another reason why Penn State are No. 5—no one watches the Big Ten Network.

If they had (and bearing in mind where we write from, it's a little impossible!), then they would have seen an offense tha...

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